Here’s how to truly prioritize self-care in a powerful way that affects your internal and external worlds, helping you to get out of your head and make great strides in your healing.
Self-care is quite a buzz word.
However, it is largely misunderstood.
Self-care isn’t when a busy mom is able to take a rare shower. Self-care isn’t forcing yourself to wake up at 5am to get on the treadmill.
Nor is it indulging in an entire box of chocolates in place of dinner.
In order to really understand self-care, we have to flip it over and look at the opposite of self-care – which is self-abuse.
Self-abuse is anything we are doing to our bodies that is not helping us. We are all self-abusing every day and hardly realize it. Not taking care of ourselves is completely normalized in our culture.
Common Forms of Self-Abuse that are Normalized:
- Eating Processed Foods – It is super normalized to eat processed foods, and these are very harmful to our bodies.
- Not Sleeping Enough – Staying up until the late hours of the night is not at all helpful to your body.
- Hustle Mentality – The concept of hustle is highly encouraged in our society. For some reason, working 50-60 hour weeks is glorified.
- Not Resting – Your body needs rest – some days more than others. Forcing yourself through your day, without taking a rest or a break when your body needs it, is also not helpful.
- Running on Adrenaline and Caffeine – Many of us are running on caffeine all day. We think it’s normal that we can’t start our day until we have our cup of coffee. When we are constantly running here and there all day, we are running on adrenaline. Both of these things are very harmful – it destroys bones, teeth, and acidifies our whole body.
- Negative Self-Talk – Sadly, negative self-talk has become so normal that we don’t even realize the way we talk to ourselves.
- Not Speaking Up For Ourselves – If you are constantly letting others walk all over you or you aren’t speaking your truth, this is a form of self-abuse linked to negative self-worth.
- Constantly Self-Sacrificing – So many of us are busy moms and dads and are always putting our little ones first. However, you also matter. You need to prioritize yourself also. We’ve been taught that taking care of yourself is selfish, but instead, it is self-love.
After reading this list, you can see that we are in this space where self-abuse is normalized.
Odds are you probably can’t think of anyone in your life that is not physically or emotionally self-abusing in some way.
It has become so normal that the abnormal is creating self-care as your highest priority every single day.
Observe Your Habits
Start to pay attention on a daily basis. Where are you engaging in self-abuse?
Is it through the words you are saying to yourself in the mirror? When you’re late, are you saying to yourself, “I’m such an idiot. I do this all the time. What is wrong with me?”
Is it through neglecting to nourish yourself properly? Are you drinking 8 cups of water a day? Eating living foods each day? Getting in leafy greens?
Are you celebrating your victories? We spend a lot more time bashing and abusing ourselves and not celebrating ourselves.
In emotion code sessions, I’m finding that I’m releasing a ton of trapped self-abuse emotions for my clients.
It’s a frequency that we can get trapped in our energy field. It can happen very early in life.
We are either taught to self-abuse, or we witness it. Then, we continue this pattern.
If you dig deeper, often it’s a result of lack of worthiness, a lack of real self-love, or a lack of real self-compassion. It could be a combination too.
Self-abuse is also a space where we are disconnected from our intuition. Self-abuse comes from the ego, and the ego says that work is more important. “Stay up and finish this – make this perfect. You aren’t allowed to nap.”
Meanwhile, your intuition could be saying, “I am fighting off a cold and I just need a 30 min nap. And if you take that nap, you won’t get sick.”
This disconnect from our intuition, our ego, and all the programming that comes from our society is really not in the best interest of self-love and self-care.
Self-care should be a high priority, above our jobs, above money fears, above the need to hustle, and above the need to be busy to avoid our problems.
We hear so much about self-care, but we really need self-love.
When we start to shift and realize that working a 10-hour shift at our job is not more important than 8 hours of sleep, we will reprioritize.
The universe will then bring in more opportunities to support this.
Your job will change or your boss will change or you’ll get a new job, or your boss will make some new rules.
You will be supported when you start to recognize what is happening in your life, why it’s happening, and setting the intention for something different.
Small Changes Have a Ripple Effect
This epidemic of self-abuse is something we need to address. It’s really witnessing the shadow side of not caring for yourself and not putting yourself first.
In order for us to change the ways of the world, we have to change ourselves.
It happens one person at a time. One step at a time. One thought at a time.
Just like all movements.
Bearing witness to our own patterns of self-abuse can be really powerful in shifting into patterns of more self-love.
As you make these shifts, you will feel so much better.
When you prioritize your self-care, you’ll be:
- More well-rested
- Better nourished
- Equipped with a stronger immune system
- Less irritable and cranky
- More hydrated
- Digesting food better
As you change your internal environment, you will witness your external environment change as well. You’ll see dramatic changes in your life.
Now that you are eating better and getting 8 hours of sleep, those small changes go on and make bigger changes.
You’ll realize that it’s bigger than what you are eating and the amount of sleep you are getting.
Now you are breaking generational patterns, you are changing the way you parent your children, you are re-parenting yourself, and you are attracting more abundance in your life.
It starts with these little pieces and habits. All of life starts to reflect your inner environment.
Remember to look at your shadow side with no shame and no guilt.
It is just a side that is there to help us attract more joy into our lives.
I am sending you all my love, and I hope this info resonates with you!